What I have learnt about running half marathons

Man.  What a crazy weekend that was!  

I'm sitting here, over a week later, finally mustering up enough energy to fill you in on all the shenanigans of my grand Day Out In Wine Country.  I tell ya, flying back from Zurich only to fly to SF a day later and then run a half-marathon doesn't half take it out of you! Obviously I blog only marginally faster than I run, so please forgive the tardiness of this post-race report - but its taken me a whole week to recover!!  Fortunately my legs are now working properly again now, so I'm no longer having to haul myself around like an old biddie, using my arms to lower myself in and out of seats/cars/the loo.  And, in a surprise Brucie-bonus, my knees were totally fine!  I don't know what all the fuss was about then when they packed up after my 9.1 mile training run - bloody fakers!  Anyway, here are some of the highlights from my Amazing Race.

First-up, the Saturday night Pre-race pasta party!

Come on feel the noise!!

Our own personal cheering squad!

Hosted by the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation, it was their opportunity to bring everyone together who was running for the CCFA and to say "thank you" for our efforts.  It was about an hour's drive from our hotel, so we met the bus at 4.30pm, all dressed in our Team TACC red t-shirts and black North Face jackets.  There were 90 of us from my company, up from around 50 the year before, so we made for a good crowd!  It was very cool when we arrived (finally) at the venue (held in a sports field in Healdsburg) as the CCFA staff had lined up ready to greet us with cheers and clappers and generally made us feel like rockstars!!  (they did that for every bus that arrived, but we were the first to get there so we reveled in the applause as we made our way to the tables!).  The event was excellent and, as promised, very inspirational as patients and supporters got up to tell their stories and the journeys that had led them there tonight.  Again, it really set it into the proper context as to why we were all there and was very humbling.  The national top 10 VIP fundraisers were recognized and, wow, was there some serious money raised!  Number 10 started at around $15,000 so, although by this stage I'd raised over $10,000, I was still quite some way off!  And the amount raised by the number 1 fundraiser?  Absolutely staggering.

The event lasted a couple of hours (and the pasta was surprisingly good, given it was being catered on such a large scale) and, as soon as it was finished, we were all bundled straight back onto the bus so as to get us back to the hotel ASAP, given the heinously early start in the morning.  Again, it took a solid hour to drive back, so it was around 9pm when we arrived back at the Silverado resort.  Then, straight off to my room and bed, ready for the big day tomorrow!!

Team TACC represents!!

Spectacular

Holy crap. Number 1 fundraiser by MILES!!!

Race day!!

Oh man. It was finally here.  After the months and months of training, the alarm went off at 4.45am and it was crunch time!  Time to get up, get dressed, caffeinated, hydrated, fed and ready for the bus at 5.30am!  I'd set out all my stuff the night before, so that I wouldn't forget anything in the early morning brain fog and stress of getting ready.  Despite that, I did initially manage to put my running pants on inside out and back to front (only realized as i was trying to locate the little pocket for my key thats at the front - and it wasn't there!), so that would have been embarrassing to have run the entire race with the tag hanging out the back!  Anyway, crisis averted, so I made sure to liberally apply the anti-chafing stick to the parts of me that may, well, chafe after 13.1 miles, I checked the iPhone was fully charged and my playlist was downloaded and ready for action, then I headed over to the hospitality room that my company had set up in the main part of the hotel.  Ostensibly it was to get some coffee and have breakfast, but it was more to be in company and have a shared "WTF AM I DOING??" moment with anyone whose eyes had the misfortune to meet mine.  Rabbit, meet headlight.

Breakfast of champions.  My pre-race fuel.  Not
too much, not too little.

On your marks....

So 5.30am and its time to all troop onto the bus.  Everyone was coping with their pre-race nerves in their own way - some folk are very loud and devil may care about their impending doom, others were quiet and In Their Zone.  Me - I was in the Twilight Zone and was still faintly wondering how I got myself in to this, mildly disbelieving I was actually on a bus that was about to deliver me to the start line of a half marathon!!  We all had on our bright orange Team Challenge vest tops on - I guess it would make it easier for the emergency services to find my body, crumpled in a heap in a ditch by the roadside.

My colleague and I on the bus with our game
faces on.  Just a mild hint of hysteria....

Get set.....

After what seemed like no time at all, we were pulling up at the location in Napa where the race was due to start.  And lo and behold, it was right next to one of my favorite places on Earth, Domaine Carneros!!  DC's rose champagne is probably my favorite out of all the domestic champagnes and Jonathan and I already had a tasting booked there on Monday.  But today, alas, I was going to have to dig deep and actually Run Straight Past It Without Stopping For Champagne - a very very tough part of the race, indeed.  As you can see from the pictures, due to the Godawful earliness of the hour, it was still a bit overcast and so the temperature was actually very pleasant.  When you run, you should always dress for 15 degrees warmer than it is (so if its 50 degrees, dress assuming its 65 degrees etc) to take into account how hot you get when you run.  My orange vest felt quite comfortable in the starting heat - so I knew I'd be totally roasting by the time the run finished!!  

First - and last - time I saw my colleagues during the
race.  They were all waaaaaaaaay faster than me...

The starting area was, as you'd expect, heaving with people of various shapes, sizes and levels of athleticism.  I think there were around 6,000 runners in total (671 from Team Challenge, so LOTS of orange vests!) but despite the numbers, it didn't feel too chaotic and the place where you went to go drop your gear off was very well organized, with piles of bright yellow school buses standing by to take your stuff and ferry it over to the finish line at Sonoma (I toyed with the idea of sneaking aboard and hiding under everyone's gear to get a lift over).  The race was due to start at 7am, so I had about 45mins or so to wait - I chatted with a few people here and there but was mainly on my own, gathering my thoughts and girding my loins.  I didn't have a running buddy, per se (all my team colleagues were far too fast to even consider running with a slowpoke like me) but I figured I'd end up pacing myself against a random fellow runner.  As it happened, they actually had pacer runners you could follow - so people who ran the race, the whole time holding up a sign that stated the finish time it would take them - so basically if you wanted to finish your race in 2hrs 30mins, just make sure you were within sight of the guy holding the 2hrs 30min sign!  Easy peasy!

My new chum Latonya and I on the starting line

The hoards gather and shuffle down to the start line

Go!

Why, yes.  Yes, I believe I am.

And then 7am came and we were OFF!  Or actually, 7am came and went and we hadn't moved from where we were, all the way in the back of the pack.  I think the mass finally started shuffling forward at around 7.07am and I think I formally crossed the start line at about 7.09am.  I crossed the start line, turned a corner to the left and BAM!  The first hill, right there, taking us up and past Domaine Carneros and launching us into the Napa countryside.  Because of the mass of people - and because I didn't want to burn my legs out too early - I decided to fast walk up the hill instead of run and get warmed up.  So thats what I did and, as soon as the hill flattened off, off I went!

My race routine was to listen to my 80's Brit classics soundtrack on my Rock My Run app which I'd been listening too throughout my training.  It was 34mins long, so almost long enough to cover a whole 5K - and so I was hoping that muscle memory, linked to the music, would help push me through.  I continually looped the same music over the course of the race so that, when it started from the beginning again, I hoped my legs would think they'd only just started running and get a fresh burst of life.  I'm not sure if I really worked or not but, but the 4th go round, I was zoned out and on auto-pilot, so maybe it helped a bit?  I had an armband case to hold my iPhone in, as well as a small packet of energy gel blocs that I planned to eat at mile 6 and mile 10 of the race, to give me a little sugar boost.  My calf muscles were fully ensconced in some newly purchased spandexy stuff, so as to stave off any in-race tweaks and twinges, so I was about as geared up as I was ever going to be.

Looking remarkably chipper at mile 10!  My furthest training run
had been 9.1 miles so double digits was all new territory for me!

And, of course, I had 16 weeks of training behind me, steadfastly coached by the one and only Vegas Bill, so I guess that may have helped a teeny tiny bit too.

And, you know what, it really wasn't too bad!  The last 3.1 miles were, by far, the hardest - partly because well, I'D ALREADY RUN TEN FREAKING MILES BY THEN!  TEN MILES, I TELL YOU!  And partly also cos the sun had fully risen, burned through the early morning clouds and it was HOT.  OK, OK, not Northern Cyprus hot, but still hot enough such that you should really be reclining-by-a-pool-drinking-G&T-hot, rather than slogging your way round the Napa countryside hot.  Along with the heat, the humidity was rising too so it was pretty crappy by the time I finished!!

The infamous wine station at mile 10!  Bonza!
Warm chardonnay is just the pick-up a finely
trained athlete like myself needs!

But I was surprised how non-eventful the first 5 or 6 miles was.  Of course, I was running super slowly (I was never going to win any prizes for speed, only effort) but, other than cheating on the first hill, I kept up a steady pace and actually ran that sucker!  I'd heeded Bill's advice to stay "well-hydrated" - but probably a little too well because by mile 3, i started to have the thought that maybe I perhaps might need a pee, by mile 5, I was definitely having the thought that I needed a pee and, by mile 6, it was no good - i just had to stop and take a pee!!  (Its like hiking, once you've had the thought - you can't stop it, eventually you'll have to pay attention and just pee already!).  There were portapotties at regular intervals along the route - but not at every mile, so I wasn't sure when the next opportunity to go would be, so despite there being a long, long line, I resigned myself to waiting.  I figured the lines weren't going to get shorter the further in the race we went (I was actually wrong on that - it was actually the longest line by MILES).

And so that's where I spent the next 10 minutes - waiting on line for a pee.  I knew it would absolutely destroy my official time but c'est la vie, couldn't be helped.  I made sure to stop my own watch so that I could have an accurate record for myself - and I did worry at the time that anyone logged onto the live race feed, tracking my progress, would be worried that I'd dropped dead or fallen into a ditch when I didn't move from mile 6 for 15 mins!!!  (as I learned later, the live feed wasn't working - good job I didn't know it at the time - it was a motivator for me to keep running during the last 3 miles!).

After that protracted break, it took me a good mile to get back into my rhythm, but i was still feeling pretty solid.  I think there's something about knowing you just have to finish the damned race that turns off most of the "this is too hard, can I stop yet?" whining that is generally going on in my brain anytime I am running.  At mile 8, my spirits received a very well-timed and appreciated boost from Lisa and her friend Peter who were there, cheering me on and wearing some highly questionable fashion!  It really does help enormously having someone in the crowd who is cheering just for you, so that put a spring in my step for the next couple of miles!

Besties reunited! (Lori - not sure why
your arms look 7ft long in this pic!!)

And then it was the home straight.  3 miles of slogging, determined to keep running, even if it was at the s...l....o....w.....e.....s.......t pace imaginable - this was going to be my personal victory.  The last half mile was the hardest of all - my watch had been counting up the miles, so I knew exactly the distance I still had left at any point in time, but the last 0.5mile seemed to never end.  You could see the finish line in the distance but it took its own damned sweet time getting closer!!  For the last 100metres, I dug deep and pushed it - primarily so I could get over the finish line before completely crapping out and also so that I'd be running at a slightly more respectable pace than my snail crawl shuffle!  I was so completely in my zone that I didn't hear Lori at the finish line yelling encouragement and urging me on.  I didn't hear Lisa and Peter either, who'd had plenty of time to relocate from mile 8 to mile 13.1 to watch me finish.  I heard nothing.   And then - I was done.   I was over the line - and I had just completed my first half-marathon.  Holy crap.   Almost immediately the people at the finish line draped a medal over my neck and handed me a bag full of "please don't die, eat this right now" supplies.  The medal was completely bad-ass - HUGE and incredibly heavy.  It almost finished me off!!!  And then Lori came bursting through the finish line too, giving me a big hug and totally trespassing in the finish zone!!  It was sooo great to see her - I hadn't seen her for ages, so it was brilliant to see her and catch up on her exciting news, even if only for a little while.

Then Lisa and Peter found me too and I gave them sweaty hugs too, then staggered over to the Team TACC tent to make sure I signed in, so that my company would know I hadn't keeled over on the course and was safe and well.  I went to go and retrieve my bag from the bright yellow school bus (yellow car!) and then Lisa, Peter and I went to go and get some well-earned BBQ and vino!  Again, the food was actually pretty good (the burgers were yummy!) and the wine tasting was also excellent!  Probably around 30 or so wine sellers/vineyards from the area and most of the wine was delicious.  We hung out, sipping and supping for a couple of hours, then it was midday and the last shuttle bus back to the hotel was leaving, so i bid Lisa and Peter a fond farewell and staggered back to the hotel, collapsed on the bed and proceeded to move very very little for the rest of the day!   I hadn't planned to do anything in the afternoon or evening as I wasn't sure how I would feel, so I instead I just chilled out, read a book, played Cookie Jam, drank champagne (thank you, Lori and Mom!) and had dinner in the bar.  I finally collapsed into bed around 10pm -and slept like the dead!  What an amazing day!!

YEY!!  The Dr H support team at mile 8!!

Sweaty hugs all round!!!

At that stage of the race, seeing a friendly face
with the cheers of support really lifted my spirits
and pushed me onwards!

No.  I know what it looks like, but I am NOT
playing kiss chase here.

Getting a message from HQ that its
time to get a shuffle on and finish
this damn race already!

And thar she blows!!  Staggering my
way to the finish line - still running!

Bloody hell!  I did it!!

Post-race rehydration system

Showing off the spoils - the LARGEST and heaviest post-race
medal I've ever seen! (admittedly, this is only my second medal
ever but even still....).  You cant see from the pic, but the medal
had a corkscrew, a wine stopper AND a bottle opener built in.
That's MY kinda medal!

The Dr. H Fan Club shows their style

And from the back....spectacular.  I have one of my
very own too - is it wrong that I want to wear it?

Thank you Lori and Mom - it was DELICIOUS!
And very well deserved!!

The day after

Ouch.  Ouch, ouch, ouch.  The day after was PAINFUL!  It was a proper "Day 2 of Austrian Alps hiking holiday" painful - ie legs were non-bendable or sittable.  Going up and down stairs was torture and sitting on the loo probably would have been easier with the assistance of a walker (the mobility device, not the undead).  Fortunately I managed to shuffle across to the grill again for a light post-race breakfast before ordering up an Uber and heading out for my reward - 2 winery tours - both to champagne houses!  One was to a beautiful boutique champagne house, the smallest one in all of Napa, called Robert Hunter (thanks for the tip, Ashley - the champs was AMAZING) and the other, yes, Domaine Carneros!  Finally, returning to one of my favorite places to enjoy a glass, or two, of their delicious rose NV champagne.

Chicken and waffles.  Perfect blend of carbs and
protein. Nom nom nom....

Picture perfect setting of the Robert Hunter champagne house.
And yes, of course I joined the champagne club...

A beautiful day made even more perfect by the fact
i didn't have to run anywhere.  Just sit and taste
champagne.

I could have sat out here all day.
Alas, we all got chucked out after an hour, but hey.
An hour in paradise will do for a start.

Fancy pants deviled eggs for lunch!

Getting down to business.  Tasting flight at Domaine Carneros.
Yum yum.

"No bird ain't gonna steal my bubbles".  Jonathan perfects the
art of the bird bitch-slap

And so that was that.  Tuesday, I flew home (still moving very slowly) and far collapsed into bed the minute I got through my front door.  All told (and the company matching gifts are still coming in), I raised just short of $11,000!!!  An absolutely stonkingly good amount of dosh - so thank you to one and all who donated, who supported me and who cheered me on from the sidelines!  It was an incredible experience and I still can't quite believe I did it.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll do another one someday....

But you know what comes next now, don't you?

I hadn't forgotten my forfeit and my promise.  All will be revealed this weekend.

The hairy, beary swimsuit shoot has almost arrived.  Shoot.