In the never-ending quest for Interesting Stuff To Do So I Can Blog About It Later, I can across a very innocuous posting in the fabulous FunCheapSF website which, as its name suggests, gives you a rundown of all the free and cheap stuff to do in an expensive city full of mega-rich tecchie types and annoying hipsters. Right after I'd decided that I need to stop being such a hermit and to Get Out More (its amazing what two days holed up in a chicken coop will help you realize about yourself), I logged on to FunCheap SF and found this workshop listed....
English Morris Dancing Workshop | Berkeley
Feeling a little sluggish? Need to get that blood pumping? Secretly enjoy live fiddle and accordionmusic?
Come join the basics of Morris dancing at the annualfree workshop series in Berkeley starting on Tuesday, August 20, 2013 and continuing for four weeks (with a one-week break with no workshops on September 3).
You may have seen Morris dancing at a local Renaissance Faire; they’re the ones with bells on their legs wielding large sticks, or flailing big handkerchiefs wildly about. Morris dancing is so old that Shakespeare was making fun of it, but it is still alive and well in its English homeland as well as all over the world, including here in the Bay Area.Wear exercise-compatible clothes and some non-marking athletic shoes. They’ll provide the sticks and hankies. All ages are welcome.
Why the hell not, I thought? I may suffer from dyspraxia and may not be able to tell my left from my right, but I'm sure that won't matter, right? How hard can it be??
Oh dear.
Well, what to say? It was all a bit of a blur, really. What i do remember is that there seemed to be an awful lot of hay involved. Don't ask me what it is but there are, obviously, many different types of it in the world of Morris - there's Hay, Worchester Hay, Passing Hay, Switching Hay, Turning Hay and my own favorites, Hay, I Have No Idea What I'm Doing and What the Hay?? There are sets and figures and sticks and strikes and turns and traditions and god knows what else. The whole endeavor/ordeal lasted just under two hours and - for the first hour, I did OK. I could pretty much follow along and didn't feel like a complete tit.
The second hour....not so much.
Here's how it worked. The instructor teaches you little bits of the routine at a time - some more or less complex than others. You practice those a few times in your little group (by the second big routine, we'd split up into 2 groups of 8, with then two groups of 4 in each) and then go on to the next bit. And so it goes. Each part, in and of itself, was not that difficult - but when you stick NINE of these mini-routines together? OH DISASTER. I had that very special moment, just as the musicians were striking the drum and getting the piccolo all fired up on the brink of the dance starting, that I had absolutely NO IDEA what the first step was and couldn't remember a single thing afterwards! It was as if I'd been parachuted into someone else's school play and had no idea what the lines were, while everyone else was just standing there, looking at me expectantly....
Of course, it wasn't quite as bad as that but i did eff it up quite spectacularly in both the beginning and the middle parts of the dance. There were a few brief moments of respite where I remembered the..um.. sticking part (basically bashing your stick against your partner's stick) which helped my profoundly damaged ego recover a little before the next humiliation. But, in essence, it was a rather challenging 40mins or so and my head was completely spinning by the time it was finished. I think the phrase "I need a drink" may have escaped my lips once or twice afterwards. I thanked my hosts of the evening for a fun experience and made a run for the door - I'm glad I gave it a go (how many folk can say they've tried Morris Dancing? (OK, OK, I know - how many people would want to say that?)) but I think I probably reached my own personal Co-Ordination Limit, so I don't think I'd really be doing them a favor by going back! Its not that i'm scared, its just for their own good.....
Tell you what, though. My bloody feet hurt this morning. No wonder they all walk funny.
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| Reaching a new pinnacle of nerdiness, never thought previously attainable without sporting facial hair and socks with sandals. Whovian Morris Dancing. |
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| The picture may be blurry but - alas - you can still tell its me... Trying out my own particular stance - the "OI! GERR- OFF MY LAND!" technique |
And this is how the professionals do it... funnily enough, i wasn't invited to join in on this one.....
4 comments:
I love Morris dancing its just so English ,so well done for watering your roots darling ! You are much braver than I, and the feeling of school play wrong script is something I can relate too. Every Friday at school ,for the last hour we had to do Country Dancing and I was dreadful ! Have the left and right problem, no sense of direction I can get lost in a circle and not remembering directions ( I kinda remember Hay too ) made it a dreadful end to the week. Well done you for exploring the very limits of free stuff to do just so we can read ,giggle and laugh about it , please keep it up !!! Ithink your feet hurting is the reason we stop skipping when we reach 9 or 10 . Loved the video and honestly, I would love to do that, if only I wasn't so old dog new tricks age !! Lots love xxxxxxxxxxx
Don't like this new format at all, finished my comment, signed in, pressed publish and then... although it says 1 comment I cant find it ! Takes me so long to do to,maybe its swimming around in the interweb cloud and will find its way home soon. So briefly your blog was brave, funny and I loved it xxxxxxxxxxx
oh soopy, you are soooo brave to try morris dancing!! when mum told me I thought oh dear god...dyspraxic with a big fuck off stick....doesn't look good for the others there!! a whovian morris dancer,welldone you!!! you are super smashing doing all these daft, and potentially fatal or lawsuit inducing things just for your faithful blog followers!!!! but loved all the different types of hay, but amazingly I can see you clearly in my mind, with your descriptions..like I am right there too,but I would be cheering you on out of big stick striking range! well done you for attempting something tricky but most importantly, something so british....there's hope for the new yank yet!!!! love you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
If I was to come in and see you waving one of those large sticks then I would have exited stage left in a hurry. Legend has it that there are other reasons why Morris dancers walk funny
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