Day 3 – White water rafting on horseback
Had a nice relaxed morning this morning – got up around 9.30am and headed down to the gym to do my stint on the treadmill. Got back up to the room, showered and treated myself to a room service breakfast of hot oatmeal, fruit and banana bread – yummy!! Then it was time to get my cowgirl on, so on came the boots, jeans and check shirt (alas, I had to leave my cowboy hat at home as I didn’t have enough room in my luggage!) and head on over to the Warner Stables for my 5hr back country trail ride. The weather had been looking fairly murky and threatening all morning and, by the time I got to the stables, was a full-on rain!! Ugh!! Got there by 12.30pm as instructed, ahead of a 1pm start – however, it was just me on the trail ride so needless to say the checking in process didn’t take very long!! One of the wranglers took pity on me (or maybe was trying to chat me up?!) and offered to lend me his slicker (no rude jokes, thanks very much) – which I absolutely accepted (all I would have needed would have been my cowboy hat to really have looked the part!). Then it was time to meet Vince, my guide for the ride and Flash, my trusty steed. I soon learnt that Flash was a complete misnomer as there was nothing speedy about my horse – he would lumber along at the slowest walk imaginable, then break into a short trot to catch up with the Vince’s horse in front! After five hours of that, certain parts of my anatomy were feeling a little saddle-sore!!!
So the route we were taking was around the base of Mt.Rundle, through the Spray Valley along the banks of the Spray River. It was fun to be on horseback again (its been a while) but everytime I do these walking treks, I re-realize that I actually like to go quite fast and, after a bit, just walking can be a bit dull! But the scenery was absolutely stunning (although, if truth be told, after a couple of hours of just walking through pine forest, it did get a teeny-weeny bit boring!). Fortunately, to spice things up a little, we embarked on a little equine river rafting as we dropped down from the forest trail right to the side of the river and proceeded to cross and re-cross at seemingly random intervals. All good fun, though, as you sat perched on the top of your horse wondering how good his footing was or if he was one of the clumsy ones!! Fortunately, both for my uninsured arse and also my camera kit, my horse had his wits about him and didn’t dump me off into the river – I’m not sure how happy they were about this turn of events, though, as the water looked pretty bloody chilly!!
After about 2.5hrs of trekking and wading, we stopped for a rest break and a cereal bar in a meadowy bit, before turning round and basically heading back the way we came. This was the first tour that Vince had done for a while so I don’t think he quite got his times worked out cos I think the last hour of the ride definitely felt like “let’s just wander around for a bit so I don’t get back to the stables too early!”. It was fun, though, as we rode past some cool waterfalls and also in the grounds of the Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel (so now I can say I’ve been there and can tick it off the 1000 Places to see before I Die list!) – all the little kids we passed were very excited to see horses, so I did feel a bit of a rock star as I waved and said hello to my adoring public!
So, got back to the stables at quarter to six and decided to head straight into town for dinner as the evening was lovely and sunny, so I thought I’d find a terrace or rooftop bar where I could enjoy the sunshine in a well-ventilated area (ie that wouldn’t mind me reeking of horses!). At the recommendation of the taxi driver, I went back to the Elk and Oarsman, but unfortunately their roofbar wasn’t open, so I eventually ended up in a place called Saltlik instead. Had to try the Alberta beef, so I had a steak and baked potato and it was yummy! Started off outside but moved in cos it got pretty cold pretty quickly (and also started raining too!). Got back to the hotel around half eight and just chilled out in my room, reading and watching a bit of telly before turning in around 10pm. Tomorrow’s adventure is a hike around Lake Louise – need to be up reasonably early to pack ready for my transfer at 8.45am.

Day 2, Part Bleugggh: The Revenge of the Chocolate Turtle
Oh dear. I think the post-prandial chocolate almond bark and caramel square put me over the top and sent me spinning into a calorie coma. I got the bus back to the hotel, got up to my room and promptly crashed out for 2hrs! My poor little tummy was not very happy with me, so I thought sleeping it off was probably the best strategy. I did feel better when I woke up and – true to my word – I headed down to the gym and got my lardy arse onto the treadmill, stat! Plugged in my “You on A Walk” and started to undo some of the astronomic gastronomic damage from earlier! After a good half hour’s fast walk, I felt much better and sufficiently invigorated to do an hour’s weights. Did enough to make both my arms and legs shake, so thought that was probably good enough (I am on holiday after all!), then went for a quick wander outside – it was so quiet (especially after Bat Out of Hell blasting full volume on my earphones!) but again, quite chilly, so I only stayed out for a few minutes before scuttling back in for warmth. Back to the room, to shower and get Malandrino-ed up for dinner. Had the Weather Channel on in the room whilst I got dressed – they have very entertaining weather reports here in Canada! I loved the weather advisory about the hail “the size of nickels” as well as all the crazy names of arse-end of nowhere places that make you wonder just how they came to be named as such (Pickle Lake, anyone?!). I had to say I felt a little sorry for poor old Saskatchewan with its 100mm of rain. That sounds like a shed load of wet to me!!!
Anyway, am now back down in the Larkspur lounge, listening to a different pianist tinkling the ivories this evening (I’m still one of the youngest people here!). It is a bit weird sitting here in the bar on my own writing my travel blog on my PC (I’m pretending I’m a journalist working for a Sunday newspaper lifestyle column), but nobody gives a shit and its better than a pack of Marlboro Light to keep me company. Tonight’s tipple of choice is a Raspberry martini concoction, made with frangelico, raspberry vodka and white Godiva liqueur – it’s a bit weird, but the barman was really keen for me to try it, so I don’t want to hurt his feelings and tell him I didn’t really like it!! After chatting with the barman, I can now confirm that the Aussies are, in fact, in total control of Banff and that they are in cahoots with the Scots. I think I’ve met about 3 Canadians in total since I’ve been here! I’m really looking forward to tomorrow as I’m going riding for 5hrs – should see some stunning scenery and hopefully get some good pics. Hopefully won’t fall off!! (especially as I forgot to buy travel insurance - oops!)

Day 2: Bumming around Banff
Ah, luxury. For the first time in ages, I was not woken by the sound of my Blackberry alarm shrieking at me but instead took my own sweet time to come to. Bliss!! Had a pretty decent night’s sleep – no dreams about franchise optimization or forecast models so hopefully that’s a good sign that I’m leaving behind the stresses of my work life! Getting up, I pulled back the curtains and was greeted by that most glorious of sights – sunshine and clear skies!!!! Obviously my call in to the God of Spontaneous Wildlife Spotting last night also managed to connect with the God of Clear Blue Skies for Decent Photography as it was a beautiful morning! I hadn’t made any definite plans for how to spend the day but the weather made my decision for me, as it was too good an opportunity to waste and almost demanded that I take the Banff Gondola to the top of Sulphur Mountain, stat!! So, I took a quick shower, got dressed in some reasonably sensible walking gear, packed the camera and lenses, slung my tripod over my shoulder and headed out for my first morning at large in the Rockies!! By sheer happy happenstance, my hotel The Rimrock Resort, was a 5min walk from the base of the Gondala, so it was perfect!!! Not even I could get lost!! Walking the short walk along the road up to the base, I got my first real taste of being outside and the full spectacle of the mountains and the amazing scenery. I stopped to take some pics (the first use of the rented wide-angle – huzzah!) but even the best picture is a poor facsimile of just how deeply impressive the views are here.
So I got to the gondola place and went inside to get my ticket. Now, its not often – even in New York – that you see a Starbucks staffed by a stuffed grizzly bear. But that’s the joy of being in the Rockies! So I had to stop and pay homage first to the Bear and buy a beary coffee before getting on the gondola. Got my ticket with a minimal wait, then 5mins later I was up, up and away in my own little private gondola, trundling up the mountains with the full panorama unfolding beneath me. I first got a brilliant view of my hotel then, as I climbed higher, the full Bow Valley with the castle-like Fairmont Banff Springs visible in the distance. Simply breathtaking.
After about 7-8mims, I got to the top and hopped off (weirdly, the whole Gondala set-up seems to be staffed by Australians) and walked out onto the wraparound viewing balcony. Holy shit. It was bloody FREEZING!!!! It might appear sunny but bugger me if it wasn’t as cold as hell!! The main bits that suffered were my poor hands which instantly froze cos I’d forgotten my gloves – matters really weren’t helped by my lugging around my photo tripod – the carbon fibre legs instantly sucked all warmth out of my fingers! So, I wandered around for about 20mins, taking pics whilst watching for frostbite, before deciding that enough was enough and heading inside, to the sanctuary of the restaurant and a very welcome cup of black coffee. Here’s where the first Sarah Clumsiness Index seemed to make a triumphant return after a long absence, as I managed to walk into the door, drop my coffee cup and twat myself in the mouth with my tripod all in one easy, fluid motion. I blame a complete lack of co-ordination brought on by partial deep freezing of my prefrontal motor cortex – my body was just an innocent by-stander. I think the Japanese tourist behind me was probably just as shocked as me – I dazedly scuttled off to the café to recover both sensation and dignity. 30mins, a cup of coffee and a cinnamon roll later, I was feeling much better – also credited to the restorative effect of gazing out at the mountains and thinking mildly esoteric existential thoughts for probably longer than is healthy. So, enough of that bollocks and time to head back down the mountain. As the gondola car pulled into the base station, I realized just how fortuitous my decision to come early had been – where just a hour and a half earlier, I’d waltzed in to the station, bought my ticket and hopped on within 10mins, now there was an ENORMOUS queue that snaked out of the station and wound all the way round the back, so WOOHOO-HOOOO for avoiding that one!! I reckon it was probably at least a 40min wait – and it still really wasn’t all that warm, so it would have been a right pain in the arse! The car park was also stuffed full so I felt suitably smug as I walked the short walk back to the hotel, thinking “YEAH! Been there, done THAT already!!”.
So, back in the hotel, I made a couple of calls to confirm my trips over the next couple of days (tomorrow’s adventure is a horse ride through the Valley), dump my digitally-challenging tripod and catch the complimentary bus into town. I had a good wander round town, with the obligatory stops in the gift shops, before settling in to the Elk and Oarsman pub for lunch, which consisted of a pint (or two) of perfectly chilled cider and a plate of beer battered haddock and chips. Only felt a mild twinge of guilt (sorry, Lacey!) as I’ve made an agreement with myself that I’ll be spending this evening in the gym burning it all off again! Which is where I’m at right now as I write this. I’m off next to go and find the free internet café, perhaps a coffee or the chocolate shop. Toying with the idea of buying some gloves, but I can’t quite bring myself to spend $40 on a pair that I already have at home!! So my hiking socks might just find themselves employed for another use tomorrow on my ride….. After finishing my shopping (have to get a mug for Mum), then I think I’ll head back to the hotel for a quick snooze (ah – such luxury) before heading down to the fitness centre and spa before dinner this evening. So far, so good!!

Day 1: Rocking the Rockies – NYC to Calgary to Banff
I now find myself faced with the biggest decision of the day –Espresso Martini or the Coco Martini? Am sitting in the Larkspur Lounge at the Rimrock Hotel in Banff, gazing out of the floor to ceiling windows at the majestic Rocky Mountains and thinking that, all in all, life is pretty good. There’s the obligatory pianist tinkling the ivories (I think I’ve lowered the average age in the bar by a good 20yrs or so) and the whole place has a mildly Art Deco, Rennie Mackintoshian feel. Possibly linked to that is that the place seems to be somewhat overrun by Glaswegians (maybe it’s a mountain thing) – one of them is currently leaning against the back of my leather wingback chair, moaning about her daughter and some ruckus at a recent family wedding, so fairly standard really.

The journey here was pretty smooth, if a little long. The day seemed to naturally break into 2.5 hr increments today – up at 7am to leave the house by 8.15am to get to Newark. Cabbie didn’t give me the usual amount of attitude today that a request to go to Newark airport usually seems to generate, so that was good. He was also awake enough on leaving the turnpike, taking the exit to Newark, to avoid a crazy-assed driver actually coming the wrong way! Obviously an accident-in-waiting - fortunately today was not my day for my number to be up!
Had a couple of hours to kill at the airport, so hung out in the Northwest lounge for a bit, then went and had an omelette in a restaurant that must have been made from freshly laid eggs hand-collected from hens in Devon, the length of time it took to arrive! Got chatting to a couple of pilots whilst waiting at the gate – they’d also been in the same restaurant but had given up and left when all the waitstaff seemed to get distracted in participating in a noisy, protracted kitchen argument, fully audible to all us starving customers waiting on our orders outside!
The first leg of the trip was a 2h 15min flight from NYC to Minneapolis – it was fine, suitably non-bumpy for a change (hurrah!) although I’d been assigned a window seat, so had to keep disturbing the chap on the aisle when I needed to use the loo (which I hate doing, btw – a product of my English heritage of not wishing to cause a fuss!). At Minneapolis, had to get off the plane for about 20mins, then tromp back on and reclaim the same seat, this time minus the passenger next to me, so unimpeded aisle access!! Huzzah!!

Another 2 and a half hour flight and several mini-bags of honey-roasted peanuts later, and we were landing in Calgary. Coming in to land, I was struck by a couple of things – one, just how insanely green everything was and two, the super abundance of improbably fluffy and exuberant white clouds that enveloped the whole landscape. It reminded me of Patagonia and especially those days in Torres del Paine spent gazing at the distant mountains, wreathed in cloud, wishing for it to clear to reveal the rugged beauty hidden underneath. Fingers crossed I get at least a little bit of clear skies whilst I’m here (I don’t want to have rented that wide-angled lens for nought!). My bags were so quick off the plane, I think they must have taken an earlier flight, so I was out through customs and the baggage hall in no time at all – then it was time for another 2.5hr chunk, this time in waiting for my transfer from Calgary to Banff. After a quick mosey through the shopping mall (I decided it wasn’t quite time yet to buy a carved marble bear or some native American art), I did what everyone ends up doing with protracted waits in airports – eating mediocre food in the Food Court and realizing that Canadian dollars don’t seem to go as far as they once used to! (I’ve just realized that staying in nice hotels has a consequence on the wallet when you’re staying on your own dime, not on a corporate card ie suddenly you notice that breakfast costs you $15 for a cup of tea and a slice of toast!!!).

Finally, it was time to meet the guy for my transfer to Banff – this time, slightly less than a 2hr drive – I had the mini-bus pretty much to myself as there was only 1 other passenger. The scenery got steadily more and more spectacular as we left Calgary (which took bloody ages as it’s a big sprawling place, bigger in sq ft terms than New York despite only having a million inhabitants) – even though dusk was falling as we drew nearer to Banff, it was still light enough to be awed by the amazing landscape. For some bizarre reason, the Rockies remind me of tree-covered chunks of Toblerone, with bare capped tops and verdant slopes. Maybe that finger of Twix I had on the plane triggered some latent chocolate longing. About an hour in to the drive, it was WILDLIFE ALERT!! My first spot of native flora and fauna – a deer skipping around in the forest that ran alongside the road – hopefully a sign of lots of beasty sightings to come! Justified all the myriad of exotic wildlife warning signs by the roadside. A short prayer to the god of spontaneous animal spotting – please let me see a bear! After five and a half years of living in a continent apparently thronging with the furry buggers, I still haven’t seen one yet – if I don’t see one on this trip, then potential drastic action is called for (ie an excuse to go to Denali National Park in Alaska for salmon season!).
Btw, I’ve just changed the time setting on my Blackberry (very very happily not checking email as I did so) and I love the way the time zone is called Mountain Time out here – it sounds so much more evocative and appealing than boring old Eastern Time.

So, now the martini (Espresso won out, btw) has now been replaced by a rather nice glass of Cabernet Shiraz and I’m very much looking forward to the next 9 days and the opportunity to simply sit back, relax and reflect on what’s been a whirlwind 5 months. Time to think and to process one of the most significant changes to have happened to my life for the last 11yrs (even moving to NYC felt less of a significant change than the one I’ve recently undertaken) and to take stock mentally of where I am right now and what might be next. I’m not looking to make any decisions but simply to recast my future thinking given that I actually did what I’d spent the last 3yrs thinking about doing (ie leaving Pfizer). Being at Pfizer was such a huge part of who I was for so long, I guess I’m in the process of carving out a new identity and finding a new place for myself in this brave new world I’ve catapulted myself into! Well, I did say I wanted a change!!! Its true what they say - be careful what you wish for!

My Next Great Adventure!

So, after 11yrs and more fun than probably should have been allowed, I'm finally leaving the comfort of Pfizer and taking a "Leap of Faith" to the other side!!  I've accepted a job with an ad agency here in the city, to be a SVP in Strategic Planning!  I start March 30th, so just enough time to squeeze in a quick vacation - a week's hiking in Utah, staying at the Red Mountain Spa in St. George.  As I start life on the agency side, I have a sneaking suspicion it'll be quite a while before I'll be able to take another holiday!!!

The Final Feathery Word....
In a suitably fitting postscript to the Indochina adventure, I received an email from Steve last week with THE definitive answer to the duck (and many other ornithological entities) question:

Collective nouns:
A flock of birds
A bevy of quails
A building of rooks
A cast of hawks
A covert of coots
A covey of grouse
A gaggle of geese
A fall of woodcocks
A flight of doves
A flight of swallows
A herd of cranes
A host of sparrows
A muster of peacocks
A nide of pheasants
A paddling of ducks!!!!

Bangers and Mash: Running the Gastric Gauntlet in Bangkok! So was up bright and early at 6.30am this morning (cycling conditioning obviously having kicked in) but had to wait til 7.30am for breakfast. Whilst I was waiting, bizarrely saw Mr Tam again who was coming to pick someone up! Striking out into the city, I made for the ferry station, a short walk away from the hotel (even I didn’t get lost!). Was very proud of myself in managing to figure out which one the local boat was and where to stand to wait for it (these things are important when you’re travelling on your own!!) and, for the grand price of 14 baht, I rode the ferry down to where the Royal Palace is. Am not sure whether it’s the humidity or that I just wasn’t wearing a hat, but it felt a darn sight hotter in Bangkok than in HCMC or Phnom Penh. I was wearing my shorts and t-shirt and, on approaching the Royal Palace, realised my schoolboy error so had to make a swift tactical purchase of a sarong (a fetching red cotton one with elephants on it) so I’d be allowed in.

The Royal Palace was absolutely stunning, very bling! Despite the relatively early hour, it was absolutely HEAVING with people so I didn’t stay all that long, just enough to work my way round, say hello to the Emerald Buddha and try and take some decent pictures without people’s heads in them! After the Royal Palace, I headed over to see the reclining buddha – wow! Very impressive – it’s absolutely enormous!! After shuffling round there and fortunately regaining my shoes from the racks outside, I was almost done with overstuffed tourist sights and feeling a little jaded from the heat, so decided that a little light shopping was in order. Firstly, though, it was time for lunch and – as I headed back to the pier to catch the ferry to the MPK shopping centre (travelling like a pro now!), I was finally seduced by the street food so threw caution (and hopefully not my intestinal control) to the wind and indulged in a sausage on a stick thing and some fried spring rolls, all washed down with coconut juice served straight from the nut! A bargain at 20baht each, less than a dollar! (less than the Imodium I’m hoping I wont need!).

So after chompage, caught the ferry to the sky train (TWO forms of local transit in a day – am I an awesomely independent traveller now or what?!) for a short ride to the Siam Square shopping centre. In the train, sat opposite this couple who looked completely stoned, the man having mildly intriguing stick-thin arms and the woman who was the absolute definition of “hippie”. Fab. So, after 2 wks of holding back my capitalist urges, I fiinally started buying stuff and got down to some serious haggling! God knows how many cushion covers I ended up buying, but at one stage I was negotiating to buy 2 cushion covers for 175 bht and was intent on beating her down from 180bht. I won out in the end but as there are 35 baht in the dollar, we were haggling over a couple cents! But it was great fun and I had a great time with lots of laughs and humour all round! Other items in my haggling haul included another couple cushion covers, a fake Omega watch and some Chanel diamond earrings. After that, I needed some restorative coffee – suitably invigorated, I decided to go get my hair done as I was fed up of looking like absolute cack for the last 2 weeks! Fortunately, the “startled cat dragged through hedge backwards” look that I’ve been championing over the last couple of weeks didn’t prove to be permanent and I’m happy to report that I still scrubbed up reasonably well! Buoyed by not looked like sh*te for the first time in 2 wks, I then got carried away and ended up buying this clay pot thing that I saw the man carving (I’m a sucker for the artistic process!). I kicked into haggle overdrive with this one and managed to get an extra one thrown in! Again, all good fun but God knows how I’m going to get it home.

On the recommendation of the pot man (not the drug type, the clay type!), I then went to another place via tuk tuk, which was a shop “local centre” selling Thai specialties that was having a 30% off sale. I can resist everything except temptation so here was the place where I finally ended up buying 12yds of purple thai silk for less than $300! (hopefully enough to replace my wardrobe cover in the bedroom) Also a little crystal elephant thing that also functions as a jewellery box that I’ll probably look at and wonder what on earth I was thinking when I get it home.

Then back to the hoteal via taxi (long way round cos he got lost but still cost less than $4! – I love this town!). Dumped the bags then headed out intending to grab a quick dinner. However, the restaurant that was recommended by the hotel was shut so took life in own hands and had proper street food (it was obviously the day for it). Found this noodle stall outside a 7 Eleven near the hotel and entered into elaborate miming with the lady to try figure out what the options were. After much oinking, clucking, mooing and grunting, we settled on pork – and it was delicious! Cost 30 baht (less than a dollar) for egg noodles, thinly sliced pork, dumplings and green stuff. YUM! Also sampled some other stuff on way home (the die’s been cast now re the squits (fingers, not legs, crossed)) including something that I bit into as a sample from the lady seller. One of the other vendors standing nearby faked a chicken scream, much to my surprise, so I guess what I was eating was fried egg of some sort! I must have looked startled cos the woman seller then wet herself laughing! Deciding I’d probably now exhausted my luck with street food and this was a sign, I headed back to the hotel for a shower before my thai massage at 8pm (300 baht). After that, time to finish packing and head to the airport and farewell Thailand!!

Oh No! It's almost over!!
Well, its now officially the end of the cycling part of my holiday as the Spiceroads itinerary finishes today in Bangkok. We were transferred back by mini-bus and I decided to travel in the first bus to give me maximum time in Bangers! So, said my goodbyes after breakfast and hopped into the van with Damian, Steve and Clint, Amy and Marcus and Daniella. The journey itself was pretty uneventful and took about 5hrs with a couple of rest stops at watering holes along the way! Bangkok was pretty much how I expected - v busy, noisy and crowded and, in general, not a terribly attractive city. Weirdly, for such a dingy place, the taxis are painted in bright vibrant hues of pink and orange! Cars are far more prevalent here too, rather than the more humble moped, I guess reflecting the increased wealth here (I kinda miss them, though!). After a very roundabout trip, the van finally dropped me off at my hotel, the Phranakorn Nornlenn, a lovely little boutique hotel that markets itself as an "urban oasis" from the craziness and noise of Bangkok. After dumping my bags in my room, I had a late lunch of Pad Thai (again!) and then spent rest of afternoon chilling out, updating blog and uploading my pics onto Picasa, ready for sharing with the rest of the group. Only problem was the number of mossies, despite me absolutely reeking with DEET (I got badly bitten a couple of nights ago, with at least 35 bites just on my left foot!! - thank God for the anti-malarials!).

In the evening, I met with Steve, Clint and Daniella for dinner – finally - no rice! Instead we went to this great Italian place along the Khao San Road, an absolutely insane backpacker street in the centre of town thats filled with every variety of stoner, drunk, hippy and sexual orientation/preference you can possibly imagine! (plus a few more you'd worry about conjuring up spontaneously!). Its certainly an experience but, as I walked back along the road to get to the main street to catch a cab, I was glad I was only passing through (and not passing out like many of its completely rat-arsed visitors!). The vibe was very seedy - and that was in one of the less dodgy parts of town, so my mind boggles to think what the rest of the place is like!! After dinner, said my final farewell to the others and headed back to hotel, ready for a full day's exploration tomorrow!

Spiceroads: The Movie
The Cast of Characters (names have not been changed to protect the innocent)
Me – Intrepid explorer extraordinaire, snake wine drinker and fried locust gourmand. Hikes faster than she cycles.
Damian – Our handsome, brave and Fearless Leader with an unhealthy fascination for groups of ducks and an inability to win at cards. Addicted to Choco Pies.
Steve –Saga Lout 1, Official Trip Entertainer with ability to talk to anyone and everyone, regularly found charming birds from trees (or fluffy silver crown pens from Vietnamese girls on ferries). In-bus audio expert specializing in makeshift karoake systems and iPod stickage solutions. Also Unofficial Trip Counseller with great discount rates available (see Daniella for pricing details).
Clint – Saga Lout 2, smooth as silk and the epitome of cycling style with That Shirt; has been known on occasion to negotiate for discounts for massages and manicures due to missing body parts.
Nico – 6’4” giant of a guy with unmatched bike balancing skills; also doubles as a human karoke machine (often in close harmony with Our Fearless Leader). Often also to be found engaging in insane bets with OFL. Though Dutch, rumoured to really be Aussie.
Lenise – Nico’s other half who was prone to fits of hysterical giggles and whose strategic deployment of the Rambo theme tune proved to be extremely valuable on the road to Pailin. Veggie who has been known to enjoy a locust or two on occasion.
Amy – unfeasibly pretty and fit Aussie girl, fellow shutterbug with an enviably better camera than yours truly.
Marcus – other half of the Aussie dream team, also unfeasibly cute and fit with a very dry and laid-back sense of humour. Keeper of the mileometer. Possible long lost twin of OFL.
Roger (aka Shiva, Destroyer of Cameras) Quiet Swiss chap by day, world champion in-line skater by night.
Christa – ever elegant and enigmatic wife of Shiva, keeper of Roger’s ever-changing and extensive in-ride wardrobe. Noted preference for fried locusts over dragonfruit for dessert..
Martin – German chap with an inscrutable expression, only periodically dislodged by puzzlement at the mention of the word “gratuity”. Always on time for breakfast.
Tom – American Vietnam vet who got progressively more chilled out and loosened up as the trip progressed, culminating in a memorable discussion of his need for a dump at the Cambodian-Thai border. Genuinely nice guy who always seemed in search of an envelope.
Daniella – Swiss miss and fellow oenophile whose misery on the ride to Pailin gave me hope that I was not alone and that someone was having an even more sh*t time than me; insanely lucky at cards.

Beach Bumming in Thailand (absolutely bugger all km!)
Rose with the sun to take some pictures, then just spent a very lazy morning chilling out and updating my blog. Had a massage at 10am – very good, even got a little prayer at the beginning which was nice! Wasn’t too much pressure but was still effective (helped along by some Deep Heat-y type stuff) so was a very relaxing way to spend the morning. Then sat out by the pool for a bit reading my book on Angkor Wat before lunch of Pad Thai and another fabulously wicked sweet Thai tea (I don’t want to know how much condensed milk went into it but it was yummy!). It’s overcast today, so not blazing sunshine but still warm, so am spending a very pleasant afternoon doing absolutely bugger all except updating my blog and processing my pictures. Still can’t quite believe that tomorrow I’ll be in Bangkok and that the trip will almost be over!

Last day of cycling already! - Pailin to Thailand (44km)

Its hard to believe its the last day of cycling already! Suddenly, the time seems to have gone by so quickly and we're now in the final few days of the holiday. So today, I get to tick off country number three in my amazing Indochina adventure, with our bike ride and transfer to our final destination in Thailand. After a fairly poor nights sleep (I was woken up at 1.30am by a cockroach running up my arm!) punctuated by more vivid dreams, and a breakfast of omolet (sp!) and bread, it was time for our final ride. Today's route would take us to the Cambodian-Thai border via 16km of similar (if not quite so awful) roads as yesterday - cycling today was hard work as my legs were like jelly and there was very little juice in the tank to start with! But again, as yesterday, I just put my head down and got on with it and also tried to enjoy more of the scenery this time, as I didnt have to keep such a close watch on the roads!! After about 50mins cycling, we arrived at the border where we had to say good bye to Mr Veng and Mr Polo and our Cambodian steel ponies. It was a fairly easy process to get our Cambodian departure cards all stamped up (again, the same intricate rubber stamping process!) before walking the short no-mans land bit to the Thai arrivals post. Here, we had to fill out another Thai arrival/departure form to get our visa, along with showing a copy of our airline ticket out of the country. But, again, all very straightforward so within the hour, we were all done and transferred across and saying hello to Mr Tam and Nick, our Thai Spiceroads local guides. Our shiny new bikes were already waiting for us and, along with the tarmac roads, it was cycling nirvana!! The only kicker was that the whole 36km in Thailand was over rolling hills, some of them very long ones, so it didnt take long before my legs were burning as hard as my arms had the day before! On one particularly evil hill, it seemed as if my legs were spinning round but that I was hardly moving!! The scenery, though, was beautiful so I just took my time, went at my own (snails!) pace and worked my way through it. We had one rest stop where the nibbles de jour was some wonderfully succulent and juicy fresh pineapple - made a very nice alternative to the full of crap Choco Pies I seem to have become addicted to this trip!

At around 11.30am, we arrived at our destination - no idea where it was but the vans were there, waiting outside this shop that served us local Thai iced coffee and orange-coloured iced tea. As per the local custom, again, was all sweetened with large dollops of sticky condensed milk but was very tasty and just the job after all those hills!! Then it was time to hand back over our bikes (my arse had completely given out after yesterday - not helped by the fact that my cycling shorts seemed to be mounting a mutiny against my nether regions, so I was quite happy to call it a cycling day by this stage!) and get in the vans for the transfer to our beach resort. We stopped at a place called Chantaburi for lunch and a Thai seafood feast (good job I've been breaking myself in on the seafood over the last 6months - fortunately, no tapeworm sushi to contend with this time!) before the final hour in the bus to take us to the Seashell Village in Leam Sing.

RESULT! The beach and resort is absolutely gorgeous and I completely lucked out with my room with my random key pick landing me a little cabin directly on the beach, built right next to the water. Whoo-hoo!!! Its the perfect place to relax, unwind and reflect on what's been a quite incredible trip. There's been so much that's happened over the last 2 weeks that its going to be great to go back over this blog, remember all the highlights and take time to organise all my pictures and memories. I've got quite a lot to think about, going back home, so this is going to be a great place to work through all those decisions. So, thank you, Spiceroads - this last place is a perfect way to end the tour!!

Sarah's Not Failin' Pailin! (89km)
Whoo-hoo!! I am SO proud of myself!! I've just completed the most INSANE bike ride I've ever done - cycling from Battambang to Pailin on some of the most spectacularly bad "roads" I've ever seen or had the pleasure to experience. In the tour blurb, it says fairly neutrally that "the road in sections is in bad condition" - err... I would estimate that "section" to have been about 85km long!! Imagine cycling over corrugated iron for 89km, except not as predictable or comfortable and with huge potholes and rocks to avoid, and you start to get the picture. Add to that some additional local hazards such as herds of cows with no sense of direction (I almost got wiped out being squashed between a calf and a moped!), chickens, dogs, various vehicles stuck in the mud and bridges with big gaps of bridge missing, and that's getting close!! Whilst not fearing for my life, I actually quite enjoyed it - especially the sense of accomplishment in finishing. At dinner last night, Damian was describing the ride and said that it was really tough and that half of his last tour group didnt finish. When asked by Steve how many of us he thought would complete the ride, Damian reckoned 8 out of the 12, 10 max. Cos I've got on the bus a couple of times, I knew he had me in mind, so I thought "I'll bloody well show you, you bugger!". So I did! I didn't know if I was going to be able to finish or not but I was determined to give it my best shot and NOT be the first person to crack and get on the bus! And I think everyone had the same idea as all 12 of us finished!!! And with no major wipe-outs either - despite the last 20km being over rolling hills, so having to keep your bike under control whilst going downhill over the same rocky and bumpy road, all the time your arms absolutely burning like hell and your wrists completely knackered!! I think that was the worst bit for me - sure, my legs were getting tired by the end of the day, but my arms and wrists were screaming in agony, but I was determined not to give up without a fight! (mind you, if I think I'm suffering now, just wait til the morning! I dont think I'm going to have the strength to brush my teeth!). We were actually really lucky with the weather as it was fairly cloudy for most of the day, so we didn't have to endure the sun beating down on us as ferociously as it has on previous days. Also the rain last night kept the dust down (unlike a couple of days ago) but did make for some suitably entertaining mud patches to slither through!

So, not many pictures from today cos the main thing I was looking at was the patch of road 6ft ahead of my bike! Apparently the scenery was quite nice in places! Another interesting tidbit about the area we were riding through is that is used to be until quite recently (ie the last 10yrs or so) bandit country and not at all safe to be in. Obviously its now completely safe (kinda), but Damian did warn us not to stray off the roads as there are still many unexploded landmines in the area, laid by the Khmer Rouge in the late 70's (ostensibly to keep the Thai's from invading but probably more likely to keep the Cambodians from trying to escape across the border). Also, there are still reputed to be some Khmer Rouge living their communist ideals up in the mountains - fortunately, we didnt run into any (unlike a previous tour one time!). Other highlights of the day for me was my first (and probably last!) fried locust at one of the rest stops - although I made the schoolboy error of looking at it before putting it in my mouth (I'm sure it winked at me and waved its antennae), it was actually quite tasty! Really smoky and savoury and - surprise, surprise, tasted like chicken! Looking more closely at the platter of fried insects, I was then thankful that I'd picked out a locust and not a cockroach - you do need to draw the line somewhere on the insect minging-ness index - and cockroaches are it! (although I guess it would be a novel way of pest control back in my apt in Manhattan!). We also saw a number of monks in their bright orange robes lining up for their alms so at least I took a couple of pics. Also we got a great group shot at the temple gates coming into Pailin - everyone was tired but extremely happy to have completed the ride!!

So am now in the hotel in Pailin, having enjoyed a very well deserved shower and I can feel myself stiffening up by the minute! Dinner is a bit earlier tonight at 7pm - just as well cos I'm not sure I'll be able to keep awake for much longer. YEY ME!!!!

Bada-bing, Battambang! (0km, transfer day)
Transfer day today, so up early ready for 6.30am departure. Alas, things didnt go quite as planned initially with the tickets and the boat - on getting to the harbour, they tried to palm us off with this shite bucket of a boat with plastic seats (for a 10hr journey, no way!) but Damian held firm so eventually this much better (relatively speaking) boat with padded seats turned up and we were on our way. Entertainingly, our boat was driven by this local kid who couldnt have been more than about 12yrs old - even more funny is that not one of us of the group made any comment about it! It was like "yeah, well, whatever!"!! The trip up the Tonle Sap through the mangrove swamps was fairly uneventful, except for me getting completely drenched not once, but TWICE from the wake of passing boats, setting Lenise off into fits of giggles! We went past some very poor floating villages where obviously the main activity and source of income was fishing. After about 4hrs of chugging along, we stopped briefly at a floating store where a few of our group bought some beer to drink on the top deck, then off again for the next 4hrs. The weather got worse and it started raining but, by that stage, I was already completely soaking so it really made very little difference!! But, by and large, it was quite a comfortable journey - I finished the book I'd bought the day before written by this woman who'd survived the rule of the Khmer Rouge as a child. Very compelling, extremely well written and very moving.

We arrived at our destination of Battambang ahead of schedule at around half three. Battambang is described as Cambodia's second capital - "a sleepy city full of faded colonial charm". We transferred to our hotel, The Golden Palace, which was very basic, so it was definitely back down to earth after the luxury of the past 3 nights!! I was quite tired so dithered with the idea of having a snooze but instead joined some of the others for a walk into town and have a look round. The map of hte town was completely useless (the drawing of the railway lines was especially liberal!) so of course we got lost but it was still interesting to walk through the town and observe daily life going on around us. Its not a tourist town here, so it was all very rough and raw and we obviously attracted our fair share of stares and giggles! Eventually, after much farting about and wrong turns, we managed to find a bar, the Gecko cafe, to sit and have a drink in. Whilst Daniella went and got her toenails done for $1, me, Clint and Tom took a Tuk-Tuk back to the hotel (via the cakeshop) (we drove a hard bargain and negotiated them down from $3 to $2!) as it had got dark and the chances of us not getting lost on the way back were pretty close to zero!! Dinner is at 8pm, so just time now for a quick shower and catch up on the news!!

Angkor Wattage, Part Deux (50km)
Today was another day to explore the amazing architecture and culture of Angkor Wat. After a fab breakfast, we left Siam Reap by bike to cycle to Kbal Spean (River of the Lingas) where we were to hike to the top of a hill to see some exquisite riverbed carvings. The ride was very nice, at a good pace, through some very pretty countryside. After about 20km we stopped for rest and quick Choco Pie refill before cranking out another 20km. After another quick breather, we cycled the final 10km on some very very dusty roads (hence the surgical masks we’d been given at the start of the ride!) and so got covered with thick layer of red dust! Although the road was pretty even, it was uphill in parts too so ensured we got a good workout!

We arrived at our lunch stop at around 11.30am but no-one was hungry so instead we all trooped up the hill (a 2km hike) to go and see the river bed carvings. I really enjoyed the hike (reminded me of Patagonia) and discovered that I probably hike faster than I cycle!! The carvings were good although maybe a little bit disappointing after the splendour of Angkor Wat, but it was different and good to get some non-cycling muscles working, so enjoyable nonetheless.

Trooping back down the hill, we returned to the restaurant for lunch before heading back to Siam Reap via Banteay Srei temple. Also known (I think) as the temple of the Dancing Ladies, the bas-relief motif carvings were as intricate and impressive as those I saw at Angkor Wat yesterday, so it was a great stop. I also got to indulge in a little surruptious monk stalking, as I tried to get a good picture! Succumbed to the pressure to buy something of one of the gazillions of kids selling stuff so ended up buying a silk scarf off this very persistent girl – I managed to barter her down to $8 and thought I’d done quite well until her mate rushed up, just as I was leaving, and promptly sold me a second one for $5!! Ah well!! Also bought this very cute little elephant carving for $2.

Transfer by bus back to Siam Reap, back mid-afternoon, so enough time to visit the market and do a little more shopping (bought this beautiful purple silk throw for the bed for only $13 plus another elephant that reminded me of the one Mum used to have when I was a kid). Also bought in supplies for the 8hr boat ride tomorrow and picked up my laundry from the lady round the corner (only $4!!). Treated myself to a mint choc chip ice-cream, got some cash out and then had a nice long soak in the bath at the hotel. Bliss, bliss, bliss. In the evening, we all went to a very nice restaurant (felt distinctly scruffy!) and shared some wine with Lenise and Nico – between us we got through 2 bottles and it was still only $13 each!
Left before everyone else to get back to the hotel for my massage appt at 10pm. Despite the fact the hotel was literally 200m from the restaurant, of course I got lost on the way home (turned right instead of left across the bridge). Fortunately I was saved from my own incompetence by this very nice young chap on a moped who gave me a lift back to the hotel! Phew! So made it in time for my massage, which was very good, although lady sounded like she had TB! (so I gave her an extra generous tip just in case she has large medical bills!!). Then just melted into bed ready for the off tomorrow.