Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Palaces, Pitches and Pies!

Day 3:  Our first full, non-jetlagged and being properly in our hotel apartment day in London.  Today was one of the highlights of the trip (well, for me at any rate) as we had a kick-ass tour organized - just for the girls - of a pre-opening, private visit of Kensington Palace!!  

Yep, rather than shuffle about in unison with the huddled masses, instead a wonderfully posh but lovely lady called Anna came to meet us at the hotel at 8.15am and serve as our private tour guide for the next 3 hrs or so.  Our tour began at the Palace at 9am, so we had a bit of time to stop en route via taxi to take in the Albert Memorial - we'd seen it before through half-closed eyes on the SnoozeFest bus tour from yesterday but this time, accompanied by Anna's vivid narration, everything was brought to life.
The Albert Memorial in Hyde Park
Beautiful Kensington Palace, dusted with a heavy frost first thing in the morning
Unfortunately I have a terrible memory for conversations (Mumsie will attest to this) so I'm afraid I'm going to be truly rubbish at remembering the precise details (OK, OK... any details) of the stories that Anna told us. 

And - on a side note - i just fell asleep for a few minutes after writing that  and woke up to a screen full of "d"s - so I have probably mere moments before the jetlag hits again and I slump over my keyboard again and hit the d's once more.  I shall try and write as quickly as I can.
Statue of Queen Victoria, carved by one of her daughters (seven kids!)

Anyhoo, off we trotted to Kensington via black cab (Girl Squids first ever cabbie experience!) and he dropped us off a couple mins walk from the palace gates, via the city's most expensive street, Billionaire's Row.  It used to be called Millionaires Row, but hey ho - inflation and all that.  No-one actually really knows how much the huge mansions sell for, as its all done by word of mouth plus the parties involved have to sign a non-disclosure agreement that prevent them from revealing how much money changed hands.  But Anna's reckoning was that the grand old mansions (many of which are now embassies, including the Israeli embassy) would sell for 100M GBP.   That's quite a lotta dosh.

At 9am on the dot, a lady dressed in a black jacket and trousers with a red stripe down the side (shades of  Household Cavalry) came out to meet us and escort us on our private, pre-opening tour of the Palace.  Now, only about a third of the Palace is open to the public and - of course - its nowhere near where the current royals live - so, alas, no chance of bumping into a PJs-clad Wills and Kate or a hungover Harry, returning from a late night out!  Nonetheless, there were 4 main exhibits that were on that we got to see in peace ahead of the regular opening hour of 10am.  The exhibits covered the King's State Apartment (of King George II), the Queens State Apartment (of Mary II, who ruled with King George), the life of Victoria, as well as a fashion exhibit of the contemporary Royals (the Queen, Princess Margaret and Princess Di). 

A lovely crisp winter's morning.  I've missed frost!
It was really well done but - like other exhibits in famous houses I've been too (like the Anne Frank house, for example) there is less to actually look at (other than paintings, tapestries and the wallpaper) than you'd actually expect.  Other than larger items of furniture, most of the rooms we walked through were fairly bare - I guess a precaution against light-fingered tourists!   But they did have a few knick-knacks and interesting items in display cases, especially the fashions of both the Stuart and Georgian eras (1690-1700's).  You were allowed to take photos as long as you didnt use a flash, so please enjoy the pics I took.  If a picture says a 1000 words, then settle on in for a 30,000 word blog!

Frost glittering on an ornate iron bench in Kensington
Palace gardens

The stunning - and iconic - gates of Kensington Palace.  This is where its estimated
that one million bouquets of flowers were left in tribute when Princess Diana died.

Nice bit of gold leafing


Interior.  One of the several grand staircases - this one called
the Kings Staircase.  Note all the people painted in the stairwell  -
these were portraits of actual people who visited the court -
including the guy whose job it was to wipe the King's bum!

Bonkers, right?  But - in George II and  Queen Caroline's time -
this was the absolute minimum width of a dress that you
 had to be wearing in order to be allowed into the more inner,
fashionable sanctums.  The wider the dress, the better!!


While, for the men, elaborately and heavily embroidered
jackets and waistcoats were de riguer.  

With the correct apparel and right social connections, you
could look forward to an evening of dancing and gaiety at
the Palace.

The higher the status, the wider the frock!  But looking on the
bright side - i'm sure they had built-in cupholders, so....
The King's Gallery

One of Victoria's bedrobes

Embroidery on the cuff of a jacket of Prince Albert's.  Can't decide
whether this is adorable or vomit-inducing
A private portrait of the young Queen Victoria meant just for
Prince Albert's eyes - and no-one else.  In its day, the loosely flowing
hair, the flushed expression and the amount of bare skin meant
 this would be considered borderline pornographic at the time.
Ah...gotta love the Victorians.


A teeny tiny riding jacket of Queen Victoria's
 (from a younger age)


Mourning clothes.  Albert died fairly young and she spent 40yrs
in mourning, wearing nothing but black, until she died.



Queen Victoria was a keen watercolorist - this was one of her
paintings.  

This was the bed that poor old Queen Mary II died from smallpox
in, aged only 32.  Bummer.


Now on to the fashion bits.  A collection of frocks worn by the
Queen, Princess Margaret and Princess Di

One of my favs - worn by Princess Margaret in the 50's (I think)


Famous Catherine Walker dress worn by Princess Di

And another.  Funnily enough - i remember some of these dresses
from growing up in the UK and seeing Princess Di on telly and in
the papers wearing these.

Worn by Princess Margaret

Another Catherine Walker dress worn by Diana
Oh YEAH.  No words necessary.
Cornish clotted cream, how I have missed thee.
So the tour was fun but after an hour, it was over and both our Kensington Palace guide and Anna said their farewells and left us to enjoy the rest of the morning.  In my mind, that meant immediately going to the tea room, The Orangery, for a cup of tea and a scone with clotted creat, so thats what we did.  YUM!!

We left the palace around 11.30am and came back to the hotel - where we found out the boys were rather behind schedule, so figured out they wouldnt be back in time to join us for lunch.  After a quick rest, we then headed out to Covent Garden for a wander round and to get some lunch.  It was absolutely packed (as you'd expect) but it was fun enough, with the requisite number of street performers and kick-ass violin quartets playing!  We decamped into a pub for lunch where I indulged in a steak-and-ale pie and chips (which had obviously been baked in a volcano as it was HOT!) and Girl Squid had a veggie burrito.  It was yummy enough and very filling, so job's a good 'un.


Lady juggling knives upside down on a trapeze, under giant fake mistletoe and
silver baubles.  As you  do.
Cool and groovy violin ensemble, making Covent Garden's toes
collectively tap.

After lunch, we then decided on the spur of the moment to take a trip to Kings Cross Station as a certain Squid is a mad Harry Potter fan and she wanted to go and see the wall between platforms 9 and 10.  It was a short 3 stop ride on the Picadilly line, so was easy to get to (yes, dear readers, by now, we are in full possession of 7-day Zone1-2 Oyster cards, so HA!  We are now unstoppable!*).

Yey!!  Harry Potter devotees unite!
We arrived and made our way straight to the platform where, to G.Squid's disappointment, there was no real proper wall to be found between the two platforms (hurrumph) so we had to make do with the best we could find, and mug(gle) for the camera there instead.  It was only then as we casually made our way back to the main station concourse that we became aware of the seething mass of humanity that we'd somehow completely missed on our way in, crushing in and out of the Harry Potter shop at "Platform 9 &3/4) and the HUMUNGOUS line to have your picture taken under a Platform 9 & 3/4 signpost, along with the trolley cart half-disappearing through the wall!!  G.Squid went to duly avail herself of a souvenir train ticket while I politely enquired about the length of the wait to take a picture and, upon learning the line was literally out of the station doors, very rapidly gave up on that idea.



GSquid wonders "Is this the way to Hogwarts??"

Nope.  Apparently this is!

And this was the queue to take photos of the Platform sign (which you can see
on the far left).  Crazy balls.
By this time, by a miracle, ManpanionTM and Boy Squid had found us (I'd texted them to come join us after their morning's activities, not really expecting success!) but they made it!!  Their itinerary for  the day was a tour of Chelsea Football Club's grounds and Museuem.  Boy Squid is bigly into football, so this tour was specifically a treat for him to go behind the scenes of a Premier League football club (ManpanionTM, not so much).  It was a public tour, rather than a private one, and - by the time they arrived - they had to wait for the 1.10pm tour.  The tour took them through the club's locker rooms (apparently v swanky) as well as the locker room for the visiting team (v skanky) plus the pitch itself, so i guess that probably hit on all the highlights!  

Anyway, we all trooped back to the hotel together where we all then crashed out til about 7.30pm, when we got up and headed out in search of supper.  After an abortive attempt at pizza in Harrods (got there just as they were closing, unfortunately) we ended up at this little pizza joint in South Kensington instead.  The pizzas were great (very creamy mozzarella), the service not quite so great but it did the job and we finally headed home replete around 10pm.   And now its past midnight and i'm struggling to stay awake, so thats it for now blogwatchers.  I hope you enjoy our Day 3 - and more to come tomorrow!  Toodle-pip!

* ps this plan becomes a bit more stoppable if one of us forgets our Oyster card. 
Breakfast of champions

Boy Squid conquers the world's tallest burger.
#onionringenvy

ManpanionTM figuring out what this selfie thing is all about

Its a pitch-ure!

Vote Pedro!!

The Hallowed Grounds themselves.


Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Let the Great British Adventure Begin!!!

Day 1-2: Chicago to London

Yey!!  After month's of planning, its finally here!!   Its our big UK adventure!  ManpanionTM, the Squids and I are in the UK for 10 days of action-packed, touristy-filled fun!  The Squids have never been to the UK before and, as frankly their fake British accents need a LOT of work, so where better to polish up their skillz in queuing, unnecessary apologizing and tea-drinking than jolly ole' Blighty herself?

Man down!!  Jetlag takes its toll on one of the Squids as we
kill time in Costa coffee waiting to check into our hotel room.
#americanhobo
Our itinerary is stuffed to the gills with all the classics that you never actually get round to doing when you live in the place - with the exception of today, as a travel day, we've got at least one fun thing booked to do each day.  We are spending the first week in London, staying at a very swanky apartment in Knightsbridge, within jet-lagged eyeballs distance of Harrods, so we are slap bang in the middle of everything!  It was a bit of a splurge but, as I sit here in the lovely comfy lounge, in front of the fire, watching old re-runs of George Michael music videos (two thoughts: #1: 2016 - you SUCK!  And now you've just claimed Carrie Fisher too (hands off the Queen!!); #2 Wow.  How did we all survive the sartorial horror of the 80's?!), it was a brilliant call.  The Squids have their own rooms and, aside from a spacious living room, the apartment also has a fully stocked kitchen and dining room, as well as plenty of bathrooms!   So tea on tap when required - huzzah!

So our journey here was pleasant and uneventful.  ManpanionTM and I sprung for biz class on British Airways (they were having a brilliant sale a few months ago, so why not?  Plus... we're old).  The Squids were in Premium Economy but they had plenty of room (honest) so Matt and I didn't feel completely guilty as we luxuriated on the upper deck.  And, at any rate, the Squids had had the fun of enjoying the British Airways lounge at O'Hare airport before we left - I think the server in the dining lounge had definitely completed her Extreme Over-Politeness to Strangers course, Level 2 as she was very attentive to our table.  She even brought me a fresh glass of champagne without my even asking for it!  Now THAT is service!  

Fancy fish jam in Harrods!!  Super fancy prices!  Yowzers!
The flight itself felt super-short (possibly linked to the pre/in-flight champagne...ahem) and I think there must have been a heroic tailwind, as we arrived a full hour ahead of schedule, just after 6.30am.  The queue through immigration was about 40mins long (they didn't let us all go through the Fast Track lane as only Matt and I had biz class tickets - miserable moo), so we had to pay our dues in the end.  However, it meant we had a fairly short wait for the baggage after we'd finally gotten through - plus all the bags actually made it, so that was something, I guess.  We'd booked a car service in advance to pick us up from the airport and take us to the hotel - a prescient move, given that the Heathrow Express was on strike (ahh....some things never change!).  There wasn't much traffic so the drive into Knightsbridge only took about 40mins.  It did feel a bit weird for me being on the "wrong" side of the road and the road lanes themselves felt very narrow (guess I've gotten used to fat American cars in the 12yrs I've been away!).  

Yum yum.  The Cheesecake Factory AKA Harrods.
 Anyway, we arrived at the hotel just before 8am and I was under the (as it turned out, incorrect) impression that we'd booked from the night before, so that our apartment would be ready for us to occupy as soon as we arrived.  But no - i'd mis-remembered and official check-in time wasn't until 3pm, so hence began The Great Wait.  We first went for coffee and brekkie in Costa Coffee - I had a lovely cheese and tomato toasty - yummy!!  And - while I won't comment on the politics of Brexit - the effect on the Pound is definitely having its effect on making our dollars stretch further!  Things feel noticeably less expensive than the last time I was in the UK!

After an hour of falling asleep into our paninis, we moved our disheveled asses to Harrods, where potentially looking like hobos may be interpreted as being of extreme wealth.  Alas, i don't think anyone was fooled, but we had a fun time wandering around for about an hour, especially exploring the food halls.  And the toy hall (inflatable radio controlled BB-8!  C3P0 bluetooth speaker (that i'm still seriously considering...)).  And finally the Jetlagged Hobo Rest Station where ManpanionTM and the Squids made full use of the facilities on offer.

Can you spot the ManpanionTM in this picture?
After another hour, we'd "done" Harrods (i did buy some mincemeat, so yey for mince pies next Christmas!) so decided to haul our increasingly unconscious stinky bods onto a hop-on, fall asleep, stagger-off Bus Tour.   It was one of the shorter routes that just trundled round Knightsbridge and Hyde Park, and went past the V&A, the Natural History museum and the Royal Albert Hall.  I'm not sure any of us stayed awake for all of it, but our tickets are good for 48hrs, so we've got time to take another trip when we're all slightly more compus mentus!  It was good though for idling away another hour, by which time the pubs were open and we could camp out, have lunch and stare forlornly at the phone, wishing with all our hearts that the hotel would call early and tell us our rooms were ready.  And - of course - the very minute I got up for a pee and went to the loo, leaving my phone on the table - they did!!  Yey!!!

So, now you're up to date.  The Squids have crashed out and we're not sure if we'll see them again before morning.  ManpanionTM is taking a heroic-length nap (as only he knows how) and I am blogging and drinking tea and dunking Cadbury's, while surfing through British telly for the first time in 10 years and ending up watching Cake Wars! Hmm....  But time to sign off for now and head out for some supper soon.  Tomorrow's fun includes the Girl Squid and I visiting Kensington Palace, while the boyz head off for a tour of Chelsea Football club!   HUZZAH!!!

Dropping like flies
And the wipeout is complete.  Yours truly
was the Last Man Standing/Swaying Gently
From Extreme Fatigue

Monday, December 19, 2016

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas!!

OK..OK... I know, I KNOW.

But - its the holiday season with goodwill to all men and absent bloggers, so here's a little musical treat ManpanionTM and I whipped up for you to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas!!  We hope you enjoy it!!

Dylan is available for bookings - weddings, bar mitvahs and meowsicals.


Ps not to get you all too excited and all, but I have a rather kick-ass trip coming up for the holidays, so stay tuned.....  :-)